mgmjournal

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’ve gone to dad’s house to try to escape and feel better. I’ve tried going to the gym. I’ve had my best friend come for a weekend and she even helped with my house. I’ve spoken to my mother and tried to open up about how I feel.…

If you’re pretty enough, no one will care if you really mean it when you say “I’m doing well!” If you’re put together, no one can tell how badly you want to break. If you laugh enough, everyone will think you’re happy. Just don’t let the mask slip. Keep it on and keep it together.

It sucks when everyone else can have kids and pregnancy scares and whatever and that’ll never be my life. I won’t even have a pregnancy scare. That sucks. Idk. I wish I could have even the smallest thing. I would be a good mom…

Not Robby telling me he looked at rings just out of curiosity and keeps saying “WHEN we meet” I’m so down bad for him. I genuinely hope and pray he’s my person. I hope his actions meet his words but I love him so much so my love his bigger than my doubts.

I started this journal to be able to have thoughts written down with timestamps, etc so I can journal whenever and wherever I feel the need to but also so I have a written account that sometimes I am not insane about some things time wise. I feel like I’m losing my grip on reality…

I feel like Robby isn’t very serious about me and I’m just a distraction to him and he will never want me in person. I know he has a family and children and a job and a life and he wouldn’t want to leave it all behind for just me because why would he? I…